#开心就好

loki collage

The events of the past weeks were nothing short of momentous and yet heartbreaking. So many conflicting emotions roiled in one, so many unspoken words finally spilled. I guess the batch of 14/15 will forever be remembered as the camp that got cancelled, which is immensely saddening and unfair given that the attention on us is accumulated throughout the years. Nevertheless, this 5 days of orientation was the product of the hard work of too many people for this to happen. NBSFOC is the most heavily-prepared and extensive camp around and everybody has been working for an entire year, be it canvassing, organising, liasing whatnot for it to come to fruition.

Of course, when it finally happened, the first day we saw our freshies stroll in, faces unsure and apprehensive, it definitely felt unreal and exciting. As a senior, its finally time to let a new batch relieve the fun we had exactly a year ago. To be perfectly honest, I feel guilty for not spending enough time and pushing harder for a more well-planned plan on how to handle the freshies. Granted, there were the last minute cheers our sister bombed on us and other stuff not within our control but in hindsight, a concrete plan would have been better to avoid looking lost in front of them.

To be even more honest, I don’t even think it was the best choice for me to be a GL in the first place. As a highly-introverted person, it took up way too much of my social energy to try to hype up the mood constantly. It was best to leave all that to my counterparts but when they weren’t there, it was really tiring and unnatural for me to try to break up small pockets of conversation as I myself thrived in smaller, intimate groups. The 3 days of constant activity left me with no time alone to recharge, which was honestly a horrible feeling. I guess I had enough energy to give off the impression that I was relatively outgoing for my peers back then to vote for me, or rather it was the impression I gave when in small groups with many of them that made them choose me.

But for everything that went wrong with the camp, it seemed as though all was in exchange for the newfound luck blessed upon our og. From the lack of major injuries to the unscathed selection of our freshies, I’m really thankful for the good fortune (for a change). Our freshies turned out much much better than expected, I believe way better than what anybody thought. From the day we called them up to how we saw them grow on each other, so many first impressions were discarded and by the end of the 5 days, I can safely say that the gls knew we had accomplished what we were supposed to. It was the first time in a long while that I felt a warm sense of relief and satisfaction, knowing that we had at least made a difference to the first step of uni life for these people. As an ex-freshie who experienced all of these last year, the support from your seniors and og-mates really mean a lot.

Definitely, being the only single gl, I was subjected to constant teasing about ‘preying on’ one of the freshies and to be honest, it was a fleeting thought in my head. However, after bringing them through this 5 days of non-stop activity and experiences, the meaning of being a gl dawned on me (a bit melodramatic but its true). Standing back, looking at these young fine people take on the new experiences with tethering apprehension and yet a sense of adventure, you really feel old and nostalgic all at the same time. Events like SP interaction where you recall all the nonsensical stuff you had to shout and all the ‘interesting’ positions we had to adopt really hit home the hardest, where we are now having fun making them do it and yet feeling a twinge of jealousy at the innocence of two strangers trying to get to know each other for the first time.

I don’t know about the other OGs but I really am proud and happy of our little family. The only thing that concerns me is how they perceive themselves compared to the others, who are either so much more competitive or rich in heritage and tradition. Our culture and my belief is that orientation is for one to have fun and make friends, and you don’t have to step on other’s toes to acheive that. 16 ogs and only one winner, we might as well focus on ourselves. Truly, I think we live and breathe our og’s motto.

#开心就好

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